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Otteoke

who said that getting older means getting stronger

I think I am weakening each year, I cry longer, easily hurt, easily feel afraid, feel lonely constantly even if I am in the middle of the crowd.

I've never been this weak before, what should I do?

gw takut

Renungan sesaat sebelum bobo..

jujur sih iman gw very low lah, lebih condong ngamalin "yg gw yakin bener" daripada "yg seharusnya bener"

lebih peduli sama keutuhan bangsa daripada ngebela agama dengan cara kemaren

sekarang tiba - tiba gw takut dengan semua perang di medsos bakal nyata, jadi perang terbuka di dunia nyata

kita tu take it for granted sih ya, muslim indonesia kan paling dimanja sedunia, makanan halal sepanjang jalan, musholla masjid tiap jengkal ada, adzan ga pernah klewatan, mau hijaban ato ga masih bisa masuk masjid, ulamanya juga banyak yang berpandangan luas, cewenya boleh kerja dan ngelakuin apapun, ga dipandang teroris di negeri sendiri, puasa juga dihormati, idul fitri libur ga kira2, idul adha mejeng kambing dimanapun juga jarang ada yg complain, berteman dengan semua agama ga ada yang rese ngingetin "harusnya", dan masih buanyaaak lagi

apakah semua kenikmatan dan kemudahan menjadi orang muslim dan mengamalkan ajaran Islam bakal dihilangkan dari bumi nusantara ini?

jangan ya Allah 😢😭

Tags:

Rant

Umur 33, ngidupin diri sendiri dan ngasi uang kerumah sejak umur 24, punya rumah sendiri, tapi berkebun di depan rumah aja dilarang, dg alesan "nanti keliatan sama orang" emange gw buron, kagak boleh kliatan ama orang?

Iya sih, sepupu gw punya mak yg lebih parah, tapi bukan brarti gw ga boleh nyesek gara2 itu kan?

Tuhan, saya cape...

Heuheuheu

For me, sexual attraction is a must in a relationship, hahahahahahaha

Ya kalo gw numb, ga deg2an, ga pengen megang tangan, ga pengen deket2an, artinya ya, emang ga usah maksa xp

My heart beating faster for the wrong person, been a while, not going anywhere, but I keep it and like it cause somehow it makes my life more exciting and colourful 😛

One reason why I gave up to the previous relationship was because of it, my heart never skip a beat when I saw him, never beat faster when I'm with him

I'm not attracted to him

Then why the hell I even try? Because I'm aging and I'm not getting any younger xp

One of the common thread between people that I fall with is they all have a sexy mind, a visioner, genious in a way, have a great dream that they try hard to reach, and create another one if it already coming true, will not satisfied with a common 9-5 work, living a robotic life.

I still trying to be one, those succesful visioner, and I will love to have those people in my life, together sharing the rest of my life, I hope I will find him oneday, soon..

Heuheuheu

For me, sexual attraction is a must in a relationship, hahahahahahaha

Ya kalo gw numb, ga deg2an, ga pengen megang tangan, ga pengen deket2an, artinya ya, emang ga usah maksa xp

My heart beating faster for the wrong person, been a while, not going anywhere, but I keep it and like it cause somehow it makes my life more exciting and colourful 😛

One reason why I gave up to the previous relationship was because of it, my heart never skip a beat when I saw him, never beat faster when I'm with him

I'm not attracted to him

Then why the hell I'm even try? Because I'm aging and I'm not getting any younger xp

One of the common thread between people that I fall with is they all have a sexy mind, a visioner, genious in a way, have a great dream that they try hard to reach, and create another one if it already coming true, will not satisfied with a common 9-5 work, living a robotic life.

I still trying to be one, those succesful visioner, and I will love to have those people in my life, together sharing the rest of my life, I hope I will find him oneday, soon..

Tags:

confused

why my dreams are all about regrets when i never loved him anyway

Self reminder

Nah, I am not irresponsible, I just making a choice, and that choice is including not give a f*ck for everything that will happen in my current office.

it's time to go, seeking a new path of my life, if that time I worked my ass off alone, let them working their choices by themselves ^^

Remember that there was a time that you feel left behind, forgive but never forget.

Tags:

new goal

karena hidup kurang berwarna tanpa impian

les IELTS preparation, abis itu tes IELTS

minta surat pengantar ke pak Ade

minta surat pengantar dari pak Nur

untuk dua tahun, menjauhlah dari kerusuhan kemenhub ^^

semuanya dalam tahun ini ya cinta, kamu sudah telat 2 tahun dari dateline

Sekedar pengen nyampah

32 years old

dulu pas mak gw umur segini beliau udah : punya anak 3, kerja jadi guru, dah punya rumah (KPR)

gw : pacar aja kagak punya, gimana anak... tapi dah nyicil rumah juga (baru 3 bulan)

jauh ya? hahhaha

tapi, kalau boleh dibilang, walo jauh juga dari temen yang lain, dah banyak keduniawian yang dipunya, dah sempet ngadep ke baitullah juga, alhamdulillah tak pernah berhenti, terlalu banyak nikmat yang diberi...

tapi kelakuan tetep kayak anak teka, pendendam, kalo dah ga suka ama orang bahkan denger suaranya aja alergi. karakter tetep tergantung pada orang2 sekitar, kalo mereka kondusif, jadi baik, kalo merekanya menjadikan buruk, kembali ke buruk.

malas

egois

buruk sangka

pendendam

emosian

childish

riya

sombong

tinggi hati

bertahun2 diperangi, tetep ajaaaa susah ya menghilangkannya

ketika bersama dengan teman - teman yang baik, sifat itu semua ga muncul ke permukaan, tapi ketika pencetus muncul, langsuuung semua menyerbu ke permukaan

kapankah aku dewasa? inikah sebabnya belum dipertemukan juga?

selain karena dah jarang ngaji, dah jarang puasa, dah ga jelas tujuan hidupnya (kyknya lebih karena ini deh hmm...)

karena mintanya yang terbaik dan Allah maunya ngasi yg terbaik makanya tetep nunggu gw nya baik dulu ya..

maybe..

postingan ga jelas

oya self keplak lagi, lu tu ga mau jadi tu orang, jadi ga usah "iri" untuk hal2 yg dia dapatkan, otreeeh

self keplak

lu bukan orang paling merana sedunia, jauh dari itu, so, syukuri semuaaa, pasti ada hikmahnya